PRISM

LANGUISHING STARS IN THE SKY

As the pale light of the street lamps changed to vivid colors, the bustle of the street grew. It was a busy evening for Dr. Raheema Atar. Bed after bed in the ICU did not suffocate her as she enjoyed her work with the eagerness of an explorer with plenty of imaginations.

The city of Kabul had been voraciously attacked by the covid virus. In the midst of the Taliban attacks and the covid pandemic, the people of Kabul were grief-stricken, unable to save the lives of their beloved ones. Dr. Raheema sat beside the window in her office. As she looked out through the window, she saw the wheezing Afgan sky with burning scars. But then she realized that they were shining even in the midst of the agony.

Suddenly she was startled by the alarm sound from the ICU. She knew that it would be a new patient. She ran as fast as she could to the ICU ward. The nurses brought in an old aged man who had been infected with severe pneumonia. His oxygen level was dropping and she knew that he had less chance of survival. Transferring to the ICU bed, he was surrounded by various machines beeping at an alarming rate.

She looks at him pathetically. A listless length lying without any hope. She just called his name to check his motor reflexes.  

“Ebrahim….Can you hear me?”

He just opened his eyes and closed it in a blink. She was stricken by his blue hazel eyes. Those eyes were bright and cold as the winter sky. After checking his vitals, she turned back to other patients.

Suddenly she felt someone was holding her from behind. She turned back and saw that listless hand was holding hers tightly with wide open eyes. The fog from the oxygen mask blurred his face. But his blue hazel eyes were sparkling out. In a spur of a moment, she became a doomed bird stricken by the gaze of a rattlesnake.

Her nightmarish past flashed before her. Train of events went through her mind……

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The sweet smell of rain diffused into the air. The rain drops striking on the pebbles made a frightening sound. Raheema and her sisters were enjoying the rain. It’s been years since they were confined to the iron doors of their house. The Taliban regime had created an enormous change in the Afgan outlook. They initiated many laws that were unbearable for the Afghan citizens. But atrocities made them obey like a caged bird. The changes were too sudden. Women were subjected to home alone, girls were prohibited from education. Strict Islamic rules and punishments were maintained. Gunshots became common in the Afgan atmosphere. Their glorious days were faded away by the darkness brought by the Taliban regime. Living in such a detrimental situation, their family had begun to cope up with the Taliban. But Raheema did not realize that it could change her whole life.

One day her father came and shut the door loudly. She heard the blazing argumentation between him and her mother. And then he came towards her and gave her a new pair of clothes and ornaments.

“Raheema, get ready…Today is your nikkah”

The whole world shattered before her. She could not utter a single word. Many thoughts went through her mind. How could her father take such a voracious decision?

In the evening, the mulla from masjid came along with a middle aged man.

“She is just fifteen” shouted her mother.

But her father slapped her down. Tears began to ooze from the corners of her eyes.

“Raheema, get ready…they are waiting for you…” her father roared.

Everything happened like a motion picture. The decided mahr was 2 acres of land in the outskirts of Kabul. After the nikkah, mulla blessed the newly wedded couples and went ahead. Her husband smiled at her like a warrior who won the battle. He hugged her tightly. The strong smell of tobacco made her vomit.

She was knackered like glass crystals. She hugged her mother and her siblings with emotions brimming out. She never knew that it would be their last farewell.

Her father did not even mind to bid her a good farewell. When she stepped out of her home, she saw her father inside smiling heart fully with a document in his hand. She knew it was her mahr. It was too late when she realized that her father arranged this nikkah for that mere 2 acres of land. They were down in the dumb and were in urgent need of money. But it was Rahema who became the tearful victim

The enigmatic smile on her father’s face was the only last memory that Raheema had about her family.

It was only the beginning of a saga of difficulties and obstacles. Her husband was a cruel man and her in-laws too hurted her. In the night, he explored her with the enthusiasm of an explorer in the deep sea. She whined in pain and there was no one to hear her plea.

It was also a difficult period for the Taliban. The Afghan liberation army had strengthened their fight against the Taliban. Their mornings were welcomed with bombardments and new deaths. One day it happened. Their house was too shattered under the bomb. Her husband and in-laws were crushed under the debris. And she was rescued by the Red Cross team.

Years passed…..Now Raheema is Dr Rahema Atar. Looking behind, she saw her glistening struggle from the refugee camps to the medical university in Britain. She did not have a second thought when she was asked to accompany the covid squad to Afghanistan. She voluntarily chose Kabul as it was embedded with memories of her dear family. Her mother……her sisters…..their footsteps……

     *            *           *

The blue hazel eyes evoked her past memories…..flashes of events blinked upon her eyes. She was impregnated with rage. For a while, she forgot her stand as a doctor. Her hand leaned towards the switch of ventilator…..and she turned it off. She felt a kind of calmness flowing through her mind and body…..Yes; she was feeling the calmness after a storm.

Once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through or how you managed to survive it……Sometimes you won’t be sure whether the storm is over or not. But one thing is certain. You won’t be the same person who walked in after the storm……And that’s what the storm is all about for Raheema Atar. 

   *              *             *

Raheema’s heart was brimming out with various emotions….from envy to sadness.

“Sorry….Baba…” She whispered as she looked at the name plate behind the bed.

“Ebrahim Atar”

She turned on the switch of the ventilator and walked back with the same enigmatic smile that her father had years back…..a tragedy separated her from her father and another tragedy of covid pandemic brought them together. Sometimes destiny plays cruel jokes.

Back in her office, Raheema looked at the sky through the same broken glass window….the shining stars were languishing as the new dawn approached….

The choice Raheema made between hating and forgiving became the story of “Dr. Raheema Atar’s” life.